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Luke’s Return To ‘The Bachelorette’ After Being Eliminated Is Dramatic AF

Lifestyle Elite Daily

When Hannah Brown finally sent Luke home on The Bachelorette, contestants applauded her quick shutdown of Luke's attempts to shame her about having sex in the fantasy suite. But as the teaser for July 22's episode promised, Luke wasn't ready to…
'When Hannah Brown finally sent Luke home on The Bachelorette , contestants applauded her quick shutdown of Luke's attempts to shame her about having sex in the fantasy suite. But as the teaser for July 22's episode promised, Luke wasn't ready to accept Hannah's fiery goodbye and was slated to crash the rose ceremony that week. That promo proved true as Luke's return to The Bachelorette after being eliminated was super intense. In case you missed it, the show's previous tease of Luke and Hannah's explosive fight about sex also panned out as expected when Luke asked Hannah if she agreed with him about the marriage bed being \'kept pure\' and avoiding sex until marriage. Luke was concerned about the Bachelor pattern of people claiming to be religious and still pursuing sex in the fantasy suite, telling Hannah, \'If you told me you have had sex with one or multiple of these guys, I'd be wanting to go home.\' Irked by his wording and tendency to call her having sex a \'slip-up,\' Hannah finally caught on to Luke's possessive, manipulative nature that other contestants had warned her about. \'I've finally gotten clarity on you and I do not want you to be my husband,\' she told him. Feeling like she had \'bent over backwards\' for their relationship, she refused to let him further explain himself. In addition to revealing her experience of windmill sex before he left, she sent Luke packing with the epic final words: \'I have had sex, and honestly, Jesus still loves me.\' Bachelor Nation on YouTube Bachelor Nation's delight in the elimination soured when preview footage promised Luke's return the following week. The full surprise comeback began in July 22's episode as Jed, Peter, and Tyler arrived at the rose ceremony in Greece. While they were still out of the loop about Luke, Hannah expressed joy to cameras that he was gone. Her glee played alongside shaky cell phone footage of Luke in a car and telling the camera, \'Hannah thought there's no way I'd want to be with her anymore after the last thing she told me, and she's sadly mistaken .. I still love her and this isn't over yet .. She's never told me that she loves me, but she loves me. She doesn't know it yet, but I'm on my way, and I'm coming.\' Anna Marie's BachelorTV on YouTube With an engagement ring in tow, Luke arrived at the rose ceremony, but as the other guys didn't know he was eliminated early, they didn't react. When Hannah entered, Luke stepped forward, asking to talk to her. She refused, trying to step away from him and tell him to go. \'I'm about to go psycho,\' she warned, \'so please leave.\' While Luke asked for clarity about her feelings, Hannah said he had to leave because she already sent him home. \'I'm not doing this anymore,\' she said. \'I'm not gonna let you rewrite what you said the other night.\' \'This is not about your heart,\' she continued. \'I'm sorry your heart is broken, but you've already broken my heart like 15 times through this.\' Hannah even carried the rose stand away from him, but Luke persisted. The other men then stepped in, staring him down and asking why he wouldn't go. \'Why are you doing this?\' Hannah asked him. \'I don't understand why you need closure because I have given you so many opportunities.\' With Chris Harrison on the scene, Hannah then spilled the tea to the group and explained what Luke had said the previous night. Luke's rebuttal wasn't too strong, as he said, \'I still know you still have feelings for me .. Never have I ever condemned you or judged you. So please don't put those words in my mouth.\' \'I have been very clear about every decision I've made thus far, and I was very clear the other night,\' Hannah finally told Harrison about Luke. \'I don't want him to be here.\' Giving him the clarity he asked for, Hannah then looked Luke straight in the eye and confirmed she no longer had feelings for him. That was the nail in Luke's coffin, and as he walked off into the land of scandalized Bachelor alums, Harrison told Hannah about Luke's engagement ring. She could only angrily sputter in response, but girl, same. What a way to end the journey, huh? Season 15 of The Bachelorette concludes with a two-night finale at 8 p.m. ET on Monday, July 29, and Tuesday, July 30, on ABC.'

What Being Left-Handed Means About Your Personality? Here Are 5 Facts You Might Not Know

Lifestyle Inspired | The Epoch Times

Recent studies have shown that babies’ dominant sides can be revealed as soon as 18 weeks through ultrasound! This incredible discovery shows that handedness isn’t learned; it’s something we’re born with. This raises the age-old question: in a world
'Recent studies have shown that babies’ dominant sides can be revealed as soon as 18 weeks through ultrasound! This incredible discovery shows that handedness isn’t learned; it’s something we’re born with. This raises the age-old question: in a world where 90 percent of the population is right-handed, what’s the reason for such a relatively small contingent being different? Illustration – Shutterstock | Silatip However, lefties have a big advantage in fighting and competition because opponents aren’t trained to go up against them. In addition, lefties have a disadvantage when it comes to tool sharing, as many of the things we’ve invented to save time and effort aren’t designed for them. This accounts for the small but consistent presence of lefty genes that have been passed on over the past 500,000 years! But what does being so unique mean about personality? Let’s look at some traits, both positive and negative, that most lefties share. 1. Lefties Are More Creative Illustration – Pixabay |  darwisalwan Many of the world’s greatest artists, including Leonardo da Vinci and Michelangelo, were left-handed. That’s not to mention the long list of actors and musicians who also have become huge successes with this predisposition, including Tom Cruise, Robert De Niro, and Julia Roberts, as well as Celine Dion, Paul McCartney, and Jimi Hendrix. This is probably due to two factors, the first that lefties are right-brain dominant, which is the side of the brain associated with creativity, imagination, and the arts. They see the world in a different way. The second is that from a very young age, left-handed people are forced to deal with all kinds of objects that aren’t made for them. Because they’re constantly having to figure out how to make desks, scissors, cups, and everything else work, they become adept at finding creative solutions. 2. Left-handed People Have a Big Advantage at Competitive Sports Illustration – Pixabay | 12019 An incredibly disproportionate number of professional sports stars are left-handed. Because most players are right-handed, they learn the sport and train for right-hand opponents. When they get a lefty, they’re often surprised and don’t know how to play against them. This is especially true for sports like baseball, tennis, and cricket. However, as Daniel M. Abrams, a professor at Northwestern University,  notes , in sports that feature “tool sharing,” such as golf, where clubs are designed for right-handed people, lefties have a big disadvantage fitting in. 3. Lefties Are More Likely to Suffer from Mental Illness Illustration – Shutterstock | Orawan Pattarawimonchai Unfortunately, left-handed people are much more likely to struggle with depression and other kinds of mental illness than their right-handed counterparts. As with other aspects of lefty personality, this is probably both genetic and environmental. According to US News & World Report , there seems to be an inherited tendency to chronic illnesses among lefties, many of which result in depression. The other factor is that lefties are negatively affected by the perception of their handedness as “weird” and “wrong.” Many languages, including English, associate “right” with “good” and “correct,” whereas we use “left-handed compliment” to mean something that’s deceptive and two-faced. 4. Left-handed people hear speech differently Illustration – Pixabay |  OmarMedinaFilms Sounds get processed in different parts of the brain, and it just so happens that the left brain is where most rapidly changing sounds are picked up. But lefties also use their right brain to process information, so they also get sounds that change more slowly. This means they can pick up nuances in speech and music much better. Perhaps that’s why they make great songwriters. 5. Left-handed people tend to be more fearful Illustration – Pixabay | ambermb As researcher Daniel Casasanto told US News and World Report, “it is possible that interacting with a world created mostly by righties for rights, which forces lefties to use their shield hand more often, increases activity in the brain hemisphere that is responsible for emotions like fear.” Because the outside world can seem and be more than a little hostile to people who are different, lefties can, unfortunately, anticipate negative responses from others. So as we’ve seen, lefties don’t always have it easy in life, but their unique personalities can offer lots of advantages as they see, hear, and experience the world in a special way!'

Is Our Positivity Negatively Affecting Our Kids?

Lifestyle Thrive Global

I'm settling this debate once and for all!
'This article was originally published in the Ascent . Be Positive. How can there possibly be anything wrong with that message? But is all positivity positive? And could too much positivity be negatively affecting our kids? There are two camps: 1. Those who believe we need to be positive with kids, to encourage them so that they build a strong self esteem and grow to be confident, well-balanced and successful. 2. Those that think we are being too easy on kids these days, that our excessive positivity is leading to a lack of resilience, arrogance and a sense of entitlement. These two camps have been debating for decades and appear at complete odds with each other. Those in the first camp argue that traditional approaches that focus on highlighting what kids are doing wrong and use fear, guilt and shame as character building tools are damaging. Those in the second camp fear that our coddling and constant cheerleading creates an inflated sense of self that sets kids up for failure when they get into the “real world.” I believe both camps are right. Regardless of which camp you belong to, my intention is to bring these seemingly conflicting points of view together by offering a small, yet powerful distinction. If understood, this simple nuance will settle this debate once and for all. A tall order? Give me the benefit of the doubt. As a teacher, I spend a lot of time in staff rooms listening to the comments other teachers make about “kids these days”. These are some of the common things I hear. Camp 1: “His parents are so harsh with him that now he’s afraid to make mistakes.” “She’s failing because she has not been given enough positive encouragement at home.” Camp 2: “He’s misbehaving because he’s been allowed to get away with it.” “She’s been spoiled and coddled and now she can’t do anything for herself.” Yes, these are huge assumptions and judgments being made about parents and kids. I’m not going to pretend that this is not what happens in staffrooms. But it also illustrates the huge divide in what we believe is best for kids. For a long time, I was really confused. I could see the negative effects of using controlling and fear-based tactics with kids. They became discouraged, anxious, and lost confidence. Some kids would shutdown and become so inhibited that they would lose the ability to think for themselves and others would try to preserve their autonomy by rebelling against everything. On the other hand, I also observed how using positive reinforcements made kids needy, reliant on rewards, and addicted to praise. I couldn’t help but notice how the constant esteem building seemed to give some kids the idea that they were better than everyone else and made them less able to cope when things didn’t go their way. It’s hard to be effective with kids when you are questioning something this fundamental. You become wishy washy and indecisive, not knowing when to punish and when to praise, when to be firm and when to lighten up, when to help and when to let them fail. This lack of clarity was made worse by the conflicting judgments from those around. It felt like no matter which way I went I was doing something wrong. No matter which side you think you are on, I think we are all confused. We’ve been given so many mixed messages, we’re not sure which way to go, and this teeter-tottering between positive encouragement and “tough love” is confusing for kids too. In an attempt to gain clarity, I began paying close attention to how we speak to kids when we’re trying to be positive. It sounded a little bit like this. “Great job!”,” You’re so smart!”, “You’re such a good boy/girl!”, “You look beautiful!”, “Winners don’t give up!”, “That’s the best drawing I’ve ever seen!”, “I’m proud of all your hard work!”, “Let’s go out and celebrate your straight As!” etc. While all these statements sound good, there was something not quite right about the overall message being sent. I made 3 key observations. 1) These statements were focus on evaluating the child’s performance, abilities or appearance and said little about who the child is on the inside. 2) Most of these statements contain comparative language that measures kids to a standard (good vs bad, smart vs stupid, hard working vs lazy), sending them the message that they must continue to live up to this ideal in order to be valued and accepted. 3) Many of these statements perpetuate the idea that being the “best”, “winning” or “working hard” is the only way to achieve happiness and success. What became clear to me was that while moving away from a harsh negative approach with kids is a big step in the right direction, the oversimplified idea that all we need to do is be more positive with kids was a huge misconception. So, if more positivity is not the answer, then what is? What I realized was that we’ve been more focused on molding kids externally, then we’ve been on helping them see their value within. Healthy positivity involves filling kids up on the inside, not just building them up on the outside. In my observations, most of the positivity we use with kids is what I like to call  “superficial positivity” . It focuses on praising, rewarding and encouraging the types of external behaviors that we believe will make kids “better” or more accepted by the world. But the very idea that we need to make kids better or teach them how to be “good” is the root of all our problems. If we are convinced that kids need to always be and do better in order to “measure up”, then we are regularly sending them the message that who they are right now is not enough. And this feeling of not being “enough”, that most of us have deep within our core, leads us to either give up or overcompensate for what we think we lack. This manifests in imbalanced ways as either under or over achievement, lack of motivation or obsessive behaviors, self criticism or boasting, self-harm or harm towards others, and so on. Ironically, if we remain focused on the external, even our well intention-ed positivity will likely make kids more insecure than confident. Many kids these days may appear more confident because our superficial positivity has taught them  “superficial confidence”  which often comes across with a “know it all” or “better than” attitude.  This is not real confidence.  It’s the result of overcompensating for inner insecurities. I would go as far as to say that when we use excessive praise, we may be projecting our own inadequacies onto kids and teaching them how to over-ride their perceived shortcomings. What we really want kids to have is an inner confidence. That feeling of being so secure with who they are that they don’t need to make themselves superior or inferior to others; and with nothing to prove, the best of who they are will come naturally from within. How do we accomplish this? The answer is simple.  We focus on internal esteem building.  We speak to and engage with kids in a way that makes them feel valued and accepted on the inside. And it’s not just about what we are saying and doing, it’s about how we are  being  in their presence. What does this sound like, look like, and feel like? It sounds like “I love you just the way you are”, “I enjoy spending time with you”, “I believe in you no matter what”, etc. It looks like your eyes lighting up in their presence and it feels like trust, non-judgment and pure acceptance. Isn’t this what we all really want? When kids feel appreciated for who they are instead of just for how well they measure up, they will have the inner confidence to thrive. Let’s be clear, it’s not really about the specific words we say and things we do. It’s about the energy and intention behind our words and actions. There’s a difference between a genuine compliment and praise with the strings of expectation and the fear of mediocrity attached. Kids easily pick up on what’s behind our words and deeds. The words themselves are not the issue. So please, go ahead and tell them how smart, how beautiful, and how talented they are. Just make sure you’re not sending the message that they need to be all of these things in order to be love, valued and accepted. Let’s make the message that they are loved unconditionally our greatest priority. So, if not all positivity is positive, then is all negativity negative? This is a topic for another day, but in short, I don’t think so. Saying no, establishing healthy boundaries and enforcing reasonable consequences may not always incite a positive reaction from a child, but if done with the child’s best interest at heart, this perceived “negativity” will still send them the message that they are important and cared for. Focusing on internal esteem building doesn’t mean kids will always be happy or that we always give them their way. I think one of the greatest misconceptions is that building esteem means keeping kids cheerful, confident and comfortable all the time. They are going to make mistakes, be disappointed, and get mad at us sometimes. That’s life. But if we focus on filling them up on the inside, they will have the self-assurance and resilience to face life’s challenges with optimism and grace. Isn’t that the best we could hope for? No matter which camp you belonged to at the beginning of this article my hope is that rather than worry about whether you’re being too negative or too positive with the kids in your life, you will shift your focus to making sure you are filling them up on the inside, rather than just building them up on the outside. I believe that this small, yet powerful distinction will make a world of difference! Want to learn more about how to make this shift?  Gain free access to my learning community  here . More articles by Sheila Sims: My Teaching Fail that Revealed the Answer to “Difficult” Behaviors in Kids I Did the Opposite of What a Rational Parent or Teacher Would Do What Kids Really Mean When They Say “It’s Not Fair!” I’m Accused of Being Unfair and Inconsistent With Kids We Think We Know What’s Best for Kids'

How to Make a Routine Work for You

Lifestyle Thrive Global

While it may seem like routines are repetitive, they can be a very powerful way to improve your life.
'Think back through your week. Do you have a routine? Does it seem like you regularly hit up Starbucks, take the same route to work, and put dinner on the table at the same exact time every night? While it may seem like routines are repetitive, they can be a very powerful way to improve your life.  Research from Syracuse University suggests that routines are related to satisfaction, personal identity, and achievement. Family rituals and routines can aid to psychological health and well-being. The study found that “nine out of 10 families believe it’s important to sit down as a family for a meal,” which can strengthen relationships, stability, and emotional exchange. But just because a routine can be repetitive within your family or work life doesn’t mean that you can’t switch things up. Make a routine work for you by setting up some parameters to abide by, but keep things fluid. These routine ideas allow flexibility so you can seize a spontaneous moment when it feels right. Minimize procrastination with a deadline You probably know that certain household chores have to be done during the week. And you only have a set amount of time before you rush off to work. An idea to minimize procrastination is to set a self-imposed deadline with mundane tasks in your routine. A study from MIT shows that self-imposed deadlines are effective in improving task performance. For example, let’s say your kitchen desperately needs to be cleaned, but you know it’s going to take some time to tackle those dishes.  Instead of putting off the chore for another day, set a timer for 15 minutes. Get as much done as you can inside of those 15 minutes and then stop once the timer is up. You’ll be surprised at how much you can accomplish when your brain is given a deadline. The power of written plans A planner or calendar can help you remember important birthdays and anniversaries, but it can also help you prep your week more effectively. When you write plans down, you might feel more in control of your week rather than stressing about how busy you feel. Psychologist Barbara Markway points out in an article on Psychology Today that keeping a planner helps you stay healthy, too. “It helps your physical health by helping you track things like diet and exercise,” Markway wrote. In turn, you get to make choices. When you see commitments lined up in a week, or realize you have missed several days at the gym, you can prioritize tasks that are most important to you. Don’t block schedule  You have heard of block scheduling, right? This system is popular among middle and high schools in that students take fewer classes within the day but for longer periods. But when you apply the same system to adulthood, it’s not as effective. Why? Because it locks you into a certain timeframe to complete a task or project. Someone who is unemployed might have the entire day to cook dinner but a busy full-time worker might only have 30 minutes. It’s called Parkinson’s Law which is the adage that “work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.”  A better way to complete tasks is to use a project management system instead of blocking long stretches of time on your calendar. During the week you get to decide what you want to tackle first. You gain structure from your to-do list but you also gain flexibility by deciding when to complete each task. Standardize personal finances How often do you look at your finances? You more than likely interact with money every day, but managing it is a different story. A recent study by U.S. Bank found only 41% of Americans follow a budget. You can manage your finances habitually with a few tricks to make it fun. At the end of every month, go over your income and expenses. Conduct a budgeting meeting with your favorite beverage or a playlist that keeps things light. You’ll be in a better mood to dig into your financial situation and keep financial stress at bay. You can also make it easy on yourself and automate contributions to a savings account . Most banks have the option to set up automatic transfers so you can hit financial goals without manually monitoring accounts.  Routines can be as fluid or rigid as you make them. Set a foundation that allows you to track and automate tasks, and puts timelines into place could help you feel more in control. Allow yourself enough flexibility within your routine so you can take advantage of spontaneous events. Because life should strike a balance between the routine and the unplanned.'

A Survivor of Saddam’s Prison Becomes a Patriot

Lifestyle Slice of Life | The Epoch Times

No 12-year-old should have to experience being hung upside down by the ankles while being beaten with clubs. Unfortunately, this was the reality for Hamody Jasim growing up in Baghdad, Iraq under the dictatorship of Saddam Hussein. For 25 years,
'No 12-year-old should have to experience being hung upside down by the ankles while being beaten with clubs. Unfortunately, this was the reality for Hamody Jasim growing up in Baghdad, Iraq under the dictatorship of Saddam Hussein. For 25 years, Saddam Hussein ruled Iraq as one of the world’s most brutal dictators. However, Jasim would become a patriot for both the United States and his own country. Jasim is 33 years old, and lives in Clayton, North Carolina. As a child, Jasim and his family would avoid members of the regime and the Ba’ath Party. In school, Jasim was a great student. However, he had to take bullying from children whose family members were close to or worked for the regime. If he fought back, it could mean his life. Saddam’s Prison One day, Jasim was on his way home from school when he was confronted by a Ba’ath Party police officer. The officer demanded Jasim hand over his money, and he refused. The officer hit him, put him into a truck, and drove him to the Ministry of the Interior. “It kind of like felt that you didn’t have any rights as a human. You were treated as a slave, and there was no future for you in that country. There was no future because future was only made for them, not for you,” Jasim told The Epoch Times. Hamody Jasim (2nd L) was beaten and tortured in prison at age 12. (Courtesy of Hamody Jasim) The 12-year-old found himself in a prison full of adults. Unaware, he was forced to sign a false confession. After he signed he was subjected to what was called “disco time.” Jasim was led into a windowless room with red painted walls. The Beating Before he entered the room, another prisoner tapped him on the shoulder and told him to scream as loud as he could until the guards became tired of his voice. The guards led him into the room, and hung him upside down. Then they proceeded to beat him with bats. He spent the next four weeks simply trying to survive. “At that point I didn’t think I was going to leave there,” Jasim said. Hamody Jasim (2nd L) never thought he would be released from prison. (Courtesy of Hamody Jasim) He bribed a guard with the little money he had hidden in his sock, and called his family. They were able to pay a ransom to get him out of prison, and when he was released his life would never be the same. Jasim felt resentful after his release, and felt like he didn’t have any future. He told himself one day he would take revenge on those who had abused him. Jasim went back to school, but found himself withdrawn. He had stopped caring about his future, and people close to the regime continued to abuse him. Tables Turned In 2003, an American soldier knocked on Jasim’s door. Upon seeing the soldier, the 17-year-old who had never imagined Hussein would be overthrown, finally felt a sense of freedom. Jasim went to the recruiting center to join the new Iraqi military, but was too young to enlist. He left, and had someone forge his documents to make his age 18. He came back the same day, and the American recruiter felt like he couldn’t turn him away. Hamody Jasim with General Martin Dempsey. (Courtesy of Hamody Jasim) Jasim was able to get his mother to sign for him, and he became the 19th soldier to enlist in the new Iraqi military. He was an infantrymen, and was trained by Vietnam War veterans. He trained for three months, and he and the American advisors prepared the first Iraqi unit ever in the new Iraqi military. Jasim became a platoon sergeant, and was responsible for protecting the Iraqi recruiting center. He was also responsible for conducting patrols on Haifa street, which was one the most dangerous areas in the country. Haifa Street In 2004, Jasim was on a patrol with 29 of his soldiers, and would engage in the Battle of Haifa Street. There mission was to recover the remains of Iraqi troops. Terrorist groups including Al Qaeda and ISIS wanted to capture an Iraqi soldier alive so they could behead them on television to deter others from enlisting. “You weren’t really just fighting for your life, for your valor. You were fighting for the next generation that was going to come after. You were fighting for the guys who were going to fill an application the day after to be part of the Iraqi military, so the reputation of the Iraqi military was in your hands in that battle,” Jasim explained. Hamody Jasim (L) engaged in the Battle of Haifa Street, and was one of nine survivors. (Courtesy of Hamody Jasim) The enemy had strategically placed bodies on the road, and ambushed Jasim’s unit. They were pinned down under a bridge for an hour and 45 minutes, and there was no quick reaction force to come to their aid. Jasim’s platoon leader ran out of ammunition, and was captured alive. The enemy beheaded him, and tied him to a pole in the middle of an intersection. By the time the firefight was over, only nine men remained alive. Jasim had been shot in the knee, and had taken shrapnel above his eye from a grenade. Eyes Inside The day after, he was promoted to command sergeant major, and was the youngest soldier in Iraqi history to earn that rank at age 18. During the end of 2004, the American military requested that he be the command sergeant major in charge of security for the Iraqi Ministry of Defense. Car bombs and suicide bombers were a daily occurrence. At the time, there were 50 American advisors working in the building to help build the infrastructure of the Iraqi military. There were about 4,000 Iraqi employees who worked in the building. Al Qaeda and ISIS were able to influence employees and even infiltrate the building and secure positions within the government. In 2005, a minister for Anbar province planned to show up at the building with 200 men and kidnap one of the American advisors. Fortunately, Jasim was able to gather intelligence ahead of time and thwart the kidnapping attempt. Hamody Jasim now trains and advises U.S. military personnel. (Courtesy of Hamody Jasim) That’s when American intelligence officials recruited him. Jasim became responsible for locating terrorists inside the Ministry of Defense, and building profiles on them. In another instance, he was able to gather intelligence that foiled a terrorist plot to send a suicide bomber into the building. After he stopped the attack, his identity as a source for American intelligence was blown. Jasim decided to stay because he didn’t want to leave his unit. Jasim found himself stuck inside the Ministry of Defense, and knew if he stepped outside he would be shot. He continued to work for eight months until one of his men was assassinated 14 minutes after leaving the building, on his way home to see his family. Jasim came to the United States in 2008, and became a citizen in 2017. He now advises and trains American soldiers who are being deployed to Iraq on how to contend with insider threats. For Jasim, he was proud to fight for his country and for the United States. “It was great to fight for America before even seeing what America was like. You believed in the process. You believed in freedom. You believed in the American experiment,” Jasim said.'